Itch mites are so small I had to train my eyes for months to be able to tell them. But they are boxy and feel under your rolling fingertips like a grain of sand or a grain of some carbohydrate… yellow-brown… I could fit 30 on the head of a pin, if they didn’t climb away.
Now, I have NEVER seen them move, but move they do, and you can feel it if you train yourself to feel it.
They like to hide… because their legs don’t seem to have claws on them, so you can easily brush them off… except they will climb back again.
Their favorite places: TIGHT places. Between ass cheeks, under panties, especially under the elastic… on the underside of you as you lie in bed, including your head, hair.
They rarely bite, but they itch like hell. Their bite leaves no mark, it’s like a pinprick. When they are angry, they actually leave you with a rash, by, my guess, rolling over a spot leaving it with tiny cuts, very recognizable.
They lay their eggs in the vagina, the eggs can’t fall off. They also like to hang out there, by the thousand, and cause penetration to be painful, as if you had a dry vagina… that is not the case. They may even attack the intruder, the penis, and poke little holes in it… what fun!
The vague itches during the day become big itches when you want to go to sleep. They shift around, trying to get comfortable, like you, I guess. Except until they do: it is hard to ignore them and go to sleep.
You pick them up at the doctor’s office… I picked up a big batch of them today at the chiropractor’s office… first time in shorts… by the time we were done, my butt was itching, my vulva was itching… Thank you Doc.
How to get rid of them, or at least whittle them down to manageable size?
All in the membership area of Biting Mites dot com.
PS: It’s 3 am… I got up to write this story. I had an insight that probably the itch that comes with hemorrhoids is from the itch mites. So it’s time to come up with a different medicated ointment for that!
PPS: Dead mites don’t itch… just remember that!
OK, and here is a youtube video showing a stupid dude killing “mites” on a backpack…